Tori Spelling Says Staying In Marriage To Ex-Husband Dean McDermott Was A “Disservice” To Her Kids

Tori Spelling has opened up about the complexities of her marriage to Dean McDermott and how their long journey together ultimately shaped her perspective on parenting and relationships.

On the December 10 episode of her podcast, Misspelling, the 51-year-old actress reflected on staying in the marriage for years, believing it was the best choice for their five children – 17-year-old Liam, 16-year-old Stella, 13-year-old Hattie, 12-year-old Finn, and 7-year-old Beau. Looking back, she admitted that staying as long as she did with Dean was more of a disservice to them.

“On my part, at least, the want of kids, just always wanting their parents together, I think kept me from making what was outwardly a better decision for them than what they saw between two partners,” Tori stated.

She explained how her upbringing influenced her decisions. Having grown up watching her parents, Candy and Aaron Spelling, maintain a 25-year marriage until her father’s passing, she internalized the belief that keeping a family under one roof was the ideal scenario, no matter the struggles.

“I saw a family always together,” Tori shared, “and so it was different and I always thought that as bad as things might be between my partner and myself, it’s better to have their dad in the house, than in a different residence.”

But over time, she came to realize that staying in a strained relationship wasn’t necessarily healthier for her children. “I think that kept me in the relationship far too long, and it ultimately, I feel, did a disservice to my kids,” she said, noting how the “disjointed” dynamic was tough for them to witness.

Tori candidly revealed that she and Dean had faced challenges early on, even before welcoming their first child. “I think he and I both were in a place where we might have separated or divorced before Beau was born,” she admitted, adding, “But we worked on our relationship, stayed together, and I’ll never regret not leaving then. I’m sure he wouldn’t either because we wouldn’t have had Beau.”

Despite their efforts, the marriage ended in June 2023 after 17 years. Though the decision to part ways was difficult, Tori said she’s grown to understand the importance of making choices that prioritize her children’s emotional well-being over traditional ideals.

“There’s still times where I’m like, ‘Oh gosh, it would be so nice to have that extra set of hands,’” she admitted. 

But ultimately, she recognizes that staying in a rocky relationship did more harm than good.