Billie Eilish Opens Up About Animosity She Felt Towards Younger Self And How She Overcame It
Billie Eilish recently spoke about her journey toward body positivity after she went through her teenage years hating her physical appearance.
In an interview with Vogue as part of their first video cover, the 21-year-old singer shared that she was in a very dark place growing up. “Going through my teenage years of hating myself and all that stupid s—, a lot of it came from my anger towards my body, and how mad I was at how much pain it’s caused me, and what I’ve lost because of things that happened to it,” she stated.
After feeling like her body was “gaslighting” her for a good number of years, the Bad Guy singer said she finally had to do the work to get to the other side of those dark feelings. According to her, she went through “a process of being like, my body is actually me. And it’s not out to get me.”
Billie, now all over the self-loathing, can now sing songs like “My Future,” a single from her second album released last year. “I’m in love with my future / can’t wait to meet her,” she sings in the song about self-love.
The process not only left Billie feeling better about herself, but it also helped her be more conscious of her outward expression. In her conversation with Vogue, she revealed that her clothing choices are not random but targeted at helping to better the planet. While she said she does not make noise about her moves, she does contribute to the preservation of planet Earth the way she can.
“I don’t want to be parading around like, Look at me! I’m making a difference. I just want to be making the difference and shutting the f— up about it,” she said, adding, “I shouldn’t be making any products. I shouldn’t be selling anything. It’s just more s— to go into the landfill one day. I know that. But no one’s going to stop wearing clothes. No one’s going to stop making stuff. So I just do it in the best way I possibly can.”
This would not be the first time the Ocean Eyes star would express negative feelings she had toward herself. Years back, when she was almost 18, she told Elle that she chose to wear oversized shorts and T-shirts, not as a way to desexualize herself but because she felt insecure about her breasts.
“The point is not: Hey, let’s go slut-shame all these girls for not dressing like Billie Eilish,” she said. “It makes me mad. I have to wear a big shirt for you not to feel uncomfortable about my boobs!”
The then-teen vowed in the interview to “be a woman” and embrace her curves someday.
